It's Not About Me...

There's kind of a weird joy when you realize that the lives here on this earth aren't really our lives.  I mean sure, they seem like they are... we choose where we drive to in the morning, we decide where we're going to eat.  I mean, we even have the choice to stay up all night and be completely tired at work tomorrow.  But at the end of the day and at the end of our lives, all these choices that we make seem so meaningless, they all seem...."so what?"


There has been a lot going on in my life in the past few weeks and I'm now totally convinced that my life is not really mine, but it belongs to God.  All the thoughts that I have, all the words that I say, and all the actions that I do... should be for the Maker of the universe, the Creator of the heavens and the earth.  And so I ask the fundamental question of why? Why should our lives be for someone other than ourselves?  We work hard throughout school to move onto the next grade, get into a decent college only to study more, to hopefully get that decent job where we can work and have "the good life."  Society tells us that we should be who we want to be.  We should do what we want to do and make our lives what we want to make of it.  Is this how it was intended?  I don't think so...


I've realized that everything about me (the way I look, my weird humor, odd personality, etc) all have come from my Creator.  Before I was born, God knitted me in my mother's womb (Psalm 139) and He had a plan laid out for me.  And in His infinite wisdom He created me for one sole purpose.  And that's to glorify Him in all I do.  Now often times I worry about that plan and I try to take things into my own hands.  I want my own life to go a certain way because it's comfortable to be in control.  Uncertainty is what we dislike. It makes us sick to our stomachs.  So we put on our own crowns and we play king because it makes us feel powerful.  Or... at least for the time being.  But I take a step back and I think to myself, "Really?  I'm going to put on my pseudo-crown and pretend to be king of my own life when I know that God not only created me, but also the entire universe?"  I'm so small... I'm so insignificant... yet the Maker of the heavens and the earth loves me as if I were His own child.  Now that is powerful.  Now that is worthy to be praised.  And who am I to do anything against what God wants me to do.


So God, I give You the crown.  You deserve it. Take control of my life and lead me where You want me to go. I trust Your path is much better than mine.


p.s. Today is Valentine's Day.  Thank You God for loving us first so that we know how to love others.  Thank You for Your ultimate demonstration of love in sending Your Son Jesus Christ to die for our sins so that we may have a relationship with You.


:)